The Fuss Over JZ’s Spear Continues

You know that moment when you realise you have pulled the pin on a grenade and thrown it, and then realised afterwards that you have thrown the pin at your enemies, and that you have just dropped the grenade at your feet, and you are waiting for the inevitable explosion?

It seems the explosion has finally happened. All the usual insults have been thrown. “Its degrading” and “shows no respect for the president” are but a few of the complaints about Zuma’s cartoon winky. My favourite comment though, is “the picture and the artist are racist.” How is a picture of a black man with a fair sized penis racist?

HOLD ON A SECOND! WOOOOAH! Look at the picture again… It is in fact a yellow man with a red penis. Hmmmm… I suppose you would see this as racist if you were Chinese, but would probably also keep your mouth shut as as it depicts this Chinese person as being well endowed!

Its difficult therefore to say it is JZ, and also that the picture is racist. How then did the President see the portrait as depicting him as “a philanderer, a womaniser and one with no respect”? Those were the words he thought of when he saw the painting of a well endowed Chinese person? If the shoe fits Mr President… (Or in this case, the condom)

This explains why what I can only imagine is a rogue street artist and his older gentleman friend were caught painting the person on the picture black yesterday afternoon. They realised that the President had outed himself as “a philanderer, a womaniser and one with no respect” and needed to cover up his blunder before anyone else noticed. The hard headed approach of the security guard (check this video) doesn’t help the young black man in the slightest, but it does make the video a lot more entertaining. Iman Rapetti from 3rd Degree was there recording what will be a very boring, argumentative and tedious report (if Debora Patta has anything to do with it) on the painting when the artists started repainting the painting, so there is some great footage. The older gentleman friend first painted two red X’s to show exactly where the picture needed to be “coloured in” to make JZ’s comments viable, then the youngster got stuck in with the black paint. They didn’t do a very good job though… The painting is now a bit of a mess.

And now the picture has made international news! Luckily only after it was repainted, otherwise I’m sure Sky News would be wondering why Jacob is labeling himself as  “a philanderer, a womaniser and one with no respect” when looking at a portrait of a yellow man with a red penis. They can now safely make the assumption that because the person in the painting is “black” and he has said this, it must therefore be him…